UNITY CANDLE, SAND, AND ROSE UNITY RITUALS
(addition)

In the Unity Candle Ceremony, couples use two lit taper candles (symbolizing their individuality) to light one big candle as a symbol of their two lives becoming one in commitment. Extinguishing the two tapers after lighting the Unity Candle can demonstrate the devotion to the commitment you just made. Leaving the two tapers lit demonstrates that although a new relationship has been formed, neither partner loses their individuality.

1. ____________________ and ______________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage. As together they light the center candle, they will extinguish their own candles, thus letting the center candle symbolize the union of their lives...

[Bride and Groom light unity candle, and extinguish side tapers]

As this one light cannot be divided, neither will their lives be divided.

2. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage. Marriage brings people together in a unique relationship. In their togetherness they may share many experiences as if one person but each also retains his or her own identity. Genuine love allows us to overcome our sense of isolation, yet permits us our own uniqueness as individuals. The two lighted candles before you are representative of your lives up to this moment. They are two individual and distinct lights, each capable of going their own separate directions. To bring joy and radiance into your home and lives, there must be a merging of these two flames in to one. As you take your own candle symbolizing your lives...

[Bride and Groom take the individual side tapers into their hands]

I ask that you light the center candle...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle and extinguish the side tapers]

establishing the union of your two lives into one.

3. ____________________and ______________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage...

[Bride and Groom light unity candle and extinguish side tapers]

From every human being there rises a light that reaches straight to heaven. And when two souls are destined for each other and find each other, their streams of light flow together and a single brighter light goes forth from their being.

4. ____________________ and ____________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage. The two outside candles have been lighted to represent their lives to this moment. They are two distinct lights, each capable of going their separate ways. To bring bliss and happiness to their home there must be the merging of these two lights into one light. This is what God meant when He said: 'On this account, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall be one flesh'. From now on their thoughts shall be for each other rather than for their individual selves. Their plans shall be mutual, their joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. As they each take a candle and together light the center candle, they will extinguish their own candles, thus letting the center candle symbolize the union of their lives into one flesh...

[Bride and Groom light unity candle and extinguish side tapers]

As this one light cannot be divided, neither shall their lives be divided. May the radiance of this one light be a witness of their unity in Christ.

5. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage. The two outside candles have been lighted by their parents to represent their lives to this moment. The lights, representing the faith, wisdom, and love they have received from their parents, are distinct, each burning alone. They light the center candle to symbolize the union of their lives...

[Bride and Groom light unity candle and extinguish side tapers]

As this one light burns undivided, so shall their love be one with God. From now on their thoughts shall be for each other rather than for their individual selves. Their joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. Holding hands...

[Bride and Groom hold hands around the unity candle table]

they encircle the unity candle table, and the candle itself, to symbolize the sacrificial nature of their journey together. May the radiance of this one light and their journey together be a testimony of their unity.

6. On this their wedding day, _____________________ and ______________________ make this loving commitment, to follow the greatest commandment of all: 'Love one another as I have loved you'. This they do in the hope that their union shall become a symbol of God's promise to merge two devoted lives into one. The two distinct flames represent their lives to this moment - individual and unique. To bring bliss and happiness to their home there must be the merging of these two into one, so together they light the center candle...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle]

This is what God meant when He said: 'On this account a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one.' From now on their thoughts shall be for each other rather than for their individual selves, their two lives shall be joined in dependence and growing maturity, their plans shall be mutual, and their joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. Thus they extinguish the two...

[Bride and Groom extinguish the side tapers]

forever united in the radiant oneness of God's love. Let them renew their vows each day as the memory of this joyous occasion reminds us:

The Way is Long - Let Us Go Together

The Way is Difficult - Let Us Help Each Other

The Way is Joyful - Let Us Share It

The Way is Ours Alone - Let Us Go In Love

The Way Goes Before Us - Let Us Begin

7. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage. Today, ___________________ and _____________________ make a loving commitment to follow the greatest commandment of all: 'Love one another as I have loved you.' They do this in hopes that their union will become a symbol of God's promise to merge two lives into one. The two distinct flames represent your lives to this moment - individual and unique. As you light the center candle together...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle]

the combined flames symbolize your two lives joined in dependence and growing maturity. Your plans will be mutual, your joys and sorrows will be shared alike. Extinguish the two, and you are forever united in God's love...

[Bride and Groom extinguish the side tapers]

8. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle]

Together they light one candle from two smaller candles as they acknowledge their union as husband and wife. By allowing the flame of the two smaller candles to remain lit, they also accept the individuality of each other as a means to fulfilling their oneness.

9. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle]

They come into their marriage relationship as individuals and they do not lose their identity. Rather, they use their individuality to create and strengthen the relationship of marriage. Therefore, the three candles remain lit - one for each of them, and one for their marriage - as symbols of their commitment to each other and to a lasting and loving marriage.

10. ____________________ and _____________________ are going to light their unity candle - a symbol of their marriage relationship. The candles from which they light it have been lighted by their mothers to represent their lives to this moment. The lights, representing the faith, wisdom, and love they have received from their parents, are distinct, each burning alone. ___________________ and _____________________ will light the center candle to symbolize the union of their lives...

[Bride and Groom light the Unity Candle]

As this one light burns undivided, so shall their love be one. From now on your thoughts shall be for each other rather than for your individual selves. Your joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. May the radiance of this one light be a testimony of your unity. May these candles burn brightly as symbols of your commitment to each other, and as a tribute to your parents' lasting and loving marriages.

11. ____________________ and ___________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage...

[Bride and Groom light the unity candle]

The candles from which they light it represent each of them in the fullness of their personhood. They come into their marriage relationship as individuals and they do not lose their identity, rather they create through their commitment the relationship of marriage. Therefore, three candles remain lit, one for each of them and one for their marriage as symbols of their commitment to each other and to a lasting and loving marriage.

12. [Bride, Groom, and Celebrant walk to Unity Candle table]

Now we are going to engage in a ceremony of spiritual symbolism. Ancient sages tell us that for each of us, there is a candle, a symbol of our own inner light, but that no one can kindle his or her own candle. Each of us needs someone else to kindle it for us. When two people fall in love, they kindle each other's candles, creating great light and joy and glorious expectations. Now ____________________ and ____________________, I'd like you to remember when it was in your relationship that you first realized you were truly in love and wanted to spend the rest of your lives together. And holding that thought Groom's Name, take this candle...

[Celebrant gives candle to groom]

symbol of the inner light in Bride's Name. Light it by the eternal light, with the dedication to rekindle it again and again, whenever necessary...

[Groom lights his candle with votive candle]

And Bride's Name take this candle...

[Celebrant gives candle to bride]

symbol of the inner light in Groom's Name. Light it by the eternal light, with the dedication to rekindle it again and again, whenever necessary...

[Bride lights her candle with votive candle]

With these candles we can see how to achieve a beautiful marriage. In your marriage, you will try to bring these lights, the symbols of yourselves, closer and closer to each other, until they become one great torch of light...

[Bride and Groom light the Unity Candle]

a radiant symbol of love, joy, peace, and harmony. This is the mystery of the union - two become one. Yet, it is vitally important to remember that there are always really two in a marriage, each with his or her own desires, yearnings, dreams, and wishes...

[Bride and Groom place side tapers in holders]

and these must be respected and responded to with great love, with great compassion, and with great tenderness. We know that it is the prayer of your beloved, as it is the prayer of each of us here, that you will continuously light these candles of love, so that there will always be light and joy, peace and harmony, in your hearts and in your homes.

13. _________________ and ______________________ are going to light their unity candle as a symbol of their marriage...

[Bride and Groom light the Unity Candle]

The unity candle symbolizes the new family you are now forming from your past lives. The flames you light it with both burn brighter when joined together. Now you both are charged with keeping this flame bright for the rest of your days upon this earth.

14. ________________ and ________________ will light a Unity Candle as a symbol of their love.

________________ and ________________, your relationship was just sealed by the giving and receiving of rings. This beautiful union is symbolized through the lighting of the Unity Candle. The two distinct flames represent your lives to this moment; individual and unique. The center candle you are about to light is a candle of Marriage. Its fire is magical because it represents the light of two people in love. It is a candle of unity because both must come together, giving a spark of themselves, to create the new light. This candle is also a candle of commitment because it takes two people working together to keep it aflame. ________________ and ________________, please light the center candle to symbolize the union of your lives.

[Bride and Groom light Unity Candle]

As you have lit this candle today, may the brightness of the flame shine throughout your lives. May the radiance of this one light be a testimony of your unity. May this candle burn brightly as a symbol of your commitment to each other. May it give you courage and reassurance in darkness. Warmth and safety in the cold.

The Sand Ritual is sometimes substituted for the Unity Candle Ritual - especially if the wedding is taking place outdoors, where candles are easily blown out. The material used can be beach sand, colored sand, salt, or another type of crystalline material. The Bride and Groom each have a vessel of sand which they pour into another larger vessel thus symbolizing, as in the Unity Candle Ritual, their two lives becoming one.

1. _______ and _______, you have just sealed your relationship by the giving and receiving of rings, and this covenant is a relationship pledge between two people who agree that they will commit themselves to one another throughout their lives. The most beautiful example of this partnership is the marriage relationship. You have committed here today to share the rest of your lives with each other. Today, this relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these two individual containers of sand into one - one representing you, Groom's Name and all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be, and the other representing you, Bride's Name, and all that you were and all that you are, and all that you will ever be. As these two containers of sand are poured into the third container, the individual containers of sand will no longer exist, but will be joined together as one...

[Bride and Groom pour sand into center container]

Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into their individual containers, so will your marriage be.

2. We are all members of one family - God's family. Today as ______ and ______ have sealed their commitment to each other with the exchange of rings they too make a commitment to their children. We recognize the significant role that ______, ______ , _______ and ______ play in this marriage celebrated today. They will now join ______ and ______ in this commitment to each other by contributing a part of each individual person into one blended family. Today, this relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these individual containers of sand, each representing a member of the family in all that they were, all that they are, and all that they will ever be into the center container. As each individual's sand is poured into the family's one united common container, the individual containers of sand will no longer exist, but will be joined together as one...

[Family members pour sand into container]

Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into their individual containers, so will become the bond with your family.

The Rose Unity Ritual is another good outdoor substitute for the Unity Candle Ritual. The couple's mothers each place a vase of roses on a small table. The Bride and Groom each take a rose from one of the vases and place it in a center vase, thus symbolizing, as in the Unity Candle Ritual, their two lives becoming one.

1. It is only out of families that new families emerge. Today the roses that were placed here from both of your mothers symbolize your separate lives and your two individual families. ______ and ______, you come to this moment from these two families, and the new emerges from the old, the present from the past. I ask that each of you take one of the roses and together place them in the center vase...

[Bride and Groom take individual roses and place them in the center vase]

The center vase with the roses signify that your two lives are now joined as one, and represents the joining together of your two families as one. From now on your thoughts shall be for each other rather than for your individual selves. Your joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. Today a new family makes its beginning.

2. ____________________ and _____________________, the two of you are combining your strengths and hopes in this marriage. Your decision to marry will also shape and deeply effect the lives of Child(ren)'s names. All of you will touch each other in a special way from now on. Today we are acknowledging both the creation of a marriage and the creation of a family. Each of you will contribute your individual blossoms to this new entity, combining your special selves into a bouquet that is more rich and varied than any you could create by yourselves. I ask you now to symbolize the wonder and beauty of the birth of this new family by each offering your rose to create a single bouquet. [Each puts a rose into the center vase]

Youngest child says: Together our new family will be happy.

The Catholic Unity Candle Ceremony

The Unity Candle Ceremony

Unity Candle Ceremony

Blending of the Sands Ceremony

How to Perform a Sand Ceremony